Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
