OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I touched a dick in church today
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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