if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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