Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
