It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Let's get the cat blown out
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
