once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
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Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
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I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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