Will you blow on my dice?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Randomize
