So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
