The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize