Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
