He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Randomize
