Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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