You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
