It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I wish i was in the wii world.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
