youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
