Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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