i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The uberlube is also flammable
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
