I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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