well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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