Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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