i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
