I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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