ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
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Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
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He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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