Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
