Porn is love you can see.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
