no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
