Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
