I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
