wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
