plz talk dirty to me
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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