That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
