hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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