I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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