Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
