Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
