2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
