Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
