Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
