Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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