one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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