Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
