Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize