So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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