it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize