Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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