Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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