Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that