i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.