Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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