We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
So much rum. So many feels.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
