The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
