Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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